Mike, Author at The Third Zone

Nov 16 2021

5 Words Define a Rule for Engagement and Our Capacity to Listen to Just 1 Voice at a Time

Much has been written about the inefficiencies of so many business meetings in this era of ongoing and advancing technology. Meetings that used to take an hour or a morning have too often lengthened. A key culprit is the varied technological advances that allow us all to bring greater speed and efficiencies to the way we work. Specifically, the speed of being able to respond to customers or coworkers who need our input to move forward themselves.

wasted money

And yet, we have learned that such advances have come with a price. Longer meetings because of the need to repeat valuable information because someone absolutely needed to step outside and answer a customer’s call. Or someone just wanted to get back to a fellow team member and it would only take a couple of minutes. Therefore, we too often are spending valuable time waiting on others who have found something else more important in a certain moment.

harried worker at desk

Multi-tasking was once the thing that many strived to be able to do. It was seen as a way to enhance the amount of work one could manage and that would supposedly make that person more valuable. Not so fast … as it has since been shown that the multi-tasker is less productive and less efficient. So, to the extent that meeting behaviors are a form of this it explains the need for extended meeting time … and waste.

Professor Patrick Winston taught at MIT for almost 50 years. Although he died in 2019 one of his lectures entitled “How to Speak” was posted on YouTube shortly thereafter. It has now been viewed close to five million times. It was Justin Bariso … an author and Emotional Intelligence guru … who came upon the article and although it is of value, it was what Professor Winston said in the first 5 minutes that provided an invaluable lesson. It is Justin Bariso’s article from INC. on-line magazine that I relate here.

Winston put forth what is considered a ‘priceless gem’ he refers to as the ”rule of engagement.” It’s a simple, non-negotiable policy and it’s just five words long. “No laptops. No cell phones.” Although simple, this is a rule that almost no one today follows, and that is what makes it extremely valuable. Winston’s rule of engagement is also a perfect example of emotional intelligence in real life: the ability to make emotions work for you, instead of against you.

HOW THE ‘RULE of ENGAGEMENT’ MAKES YOU a BETTER LISTENER

Winston goes on to explain the reasoning behind his rule of engagement. “Some people ask why no laptops no cell phones is a rule of engagement,” says Winston. “The answer is, we humans only have one language processor,” explains Winston. “And if your language processor is engaged…you’re distracted. And worse yet, you distract all the people around you.” We can only listen to one voice at a time. And the question becomes how can the “no laptops, no cell phones” rule of engagement helps you and your organization? We, as people are accustomed to and in the habit of responding immediately to electronic messages and that’s good. In doing so you provide information they need to move their work forward. Additionally, you show that you value them. However, in your efforts to respond quickly, you might also be making a big mistake.

By constantly checking your phone, even when you’re in a meeting or conversation with others, you leave your conversation partner feeling that you aren’t really “present”–and that you don’t care about them or the conversation. Also, just think of all the lost time in meetings in which someone repeats something that’s already said or goes off on a tangent because they were distracted and missed a key point. True listening and collaboration require complete attention. And if you’re speaking with another person, that person thought you were important enough to give you their time and attention. Why not return the honor?

In fact, because so many people are in the constant habit of checking phones, imagine what happens when someone comes to you, and you ask them for a second to put your phone away or put it on silent so you can focus on them. That gesture alone will signal how important they are to you. A “no phone” rule can be applied for specific times or places. No additional devices for collaboration meetings, for example. Or certain meetings (or parts of meetings) where all devices are put away.

A FAIRLY SIMPLE FIX

So, if you’d like to increase the quality of your meetings, conversations, and even your relationships, take a page out of Patrick Winston’s playbook: No cell phones, no laptops. And the reason? Because you can only listen to one voice at a time. You’d be surprised at the positive benefits these actions reap and the depth and quality it adds to your relationships.
Mike Dorman

References:
Inc. On-line Magazine … A Respected MIT Professor Had a Simple 5-Word Rule for His Classroom, and Every Company Should Follow It – by Justin Bariso

Nov 04 2021

Seeing the Equal Value of EVERY Person Involved In the Effort … An Even Bigger Challenge When Workers Are Remote

One question I often ask of a coaching client is how they see the job they do? What does it contribute to the team, department or organizational success? How do they see its’ importance in terms of what it contributes to the desired outcome and achievement of the intended goal? Finally, what is the value that they place on their contribution as well as the value that others place on it? Too often the answers I hear don’t make for a pretty picture. And they definitely don’t make for a cohesive group effort. That, in turn, can have very real and even detrimental impact on the success of an individual and an overall effort. Add to this challenge the fact that today and in the near future many will be working remotely thus creating actual distance that can make this reality and challenge even greater.

In an ideal environment from one’s very first day they learn to recognize that they and the work they do is a contributor to the overall success of project and/or the company. It may be related to sales, customer relations, operations, accounting, delivery, administrative or overall management. Yet the ultimate success of whatever the goal might be cannot and will not be achieved to the max unless all aspects of whatever the goal requires are handled to the same degree of successful completion. This would logically require that every person involved in the process understand and truly value the job they do at the same time it is valued by others.

THE THINGS THAT INFLUENCE SEEING A PERSON AS DOING MORE OR LESS IMPORTANT WORK

Unfortunately, and especially today, I don’t believe that such a business culture is the norm. Rather, individuals either see themselves and their work as more or less important than another’s. This is especially heightened when we can’t see others on the team as we’re not always in the office or at least at the same time. When this happens it takes the wind and needed energy out of the sails of some while inflating that of others. The result? Divisiveness among the very people who are relied upon to make it happen in a successful way.

Here are some of the things that contribute to differences in the ways that one’s particular job contribution is seen as less than by others. There were well identified by Glenn Llopis in his contribution to Forbes on writing about different ways the contribution by some is undervalued. I believe this applies to ways that others on the team devalue another’s work and present it as such to some of his points. Consider these in today’s remote work environment:

Unaware of Their Strengths
Some people involved do not see the importance of the work being done by others. They often see what they do as the most important. As such, they might not take the time to truly understand the abilities and strengths of what that person is capable of providing. When those working together can’t see beyond the obvious, they are doing themselves, their co-workers or employees and their organization a big disservice. They are unknowingly undervaluing their contributions and the opportunities before them. The remote work environment only magnifies this.
1. Refuse to Seek Their Counsel

Too often one does not see the true value of another’s job, see the person doing it and the related contribution. They may be inclined to look over them when seeking input that could improve the task, method and the outcome. This contributes to someone feeling undervalued and disrespected and thus a poor sense of their work and their desire to genuinely care.
Make No Effort to Invest in the Relationship
When any one position on a team is seen as less important than another, it delivers the message that they are less important as a person and as an important link to the desired outcome. Thus, the person feels taken for granted and down goes their interest or investment in a most successful outcome.
Provide Little if Any Feedback
If one doesn’t value the work or another the tendency is to not waste the time of providing input. Such input could alter and improve the work that person is doing. Of course, this easily can lead to that person feeling underappreciated and with that, the importance of caring and effort go south.

HOW DOES A PERSON MOVE FROM FEELING LESS THAN TO SEEING THEIR CONTRIBUTION AS IMPORTANT

This is all interesting, however, what is especially important to the person feeling this lack of appreciation and love is what they can do about it. The good news? There are steps you can take that will have a most positive impact on the person (is that you?) and the ultimate success that is the overall goal as follows:

Take stock of just how real and prominent this situation is
Do you believe that the feeling you have and your related sensitivity to it is widespread coming from many or different directions? Or is it primarily from a sole source? Are you more aware of these feelings over the past 19 months? Regardless, it is unpleasant and uncomfortable however one’s reaction and actions tend to be different given the actual situation.
Have a conversation with the person(s) who you feel doesn’t appreciate your work
Perhaps they emit the impression they do because they really don’t understand what you are doing and the related skill and challenges that it represents. Why should they? Their focus is on what they contribute and thus to some extent they take your abilities and results for granted.
Be more visible to the others
Feeling unappreciated can make us withdraw from attention and notice and that only furthers the reactions of another and our own isolation. If you are proud of what you do and the level of skill you have, let that allow you to be an active part of the group effort. After all, others don’t really understand all that is involved. Let your sense of pride allow you to have a presence to the other(s).
Be open in your recognition and praise of others and their contributions
Demonstrating your willingness to acknowledge others and their part in creating the desired success provides the example of others returning the same to you. It’s a win-win.
You don’t need permission from another to feel satisfaction and pride in the work you do and what you provide to the overall, successful effort
Being able to view what you do and the contribution it makes to the goal as being an important is key. Realizing you are a needed part of the overall effort makes you are less reliant on any other person’s view to define your real value. This enables you to move forward positively and confidently.

Amy Rees Anderson is a founder and Managing Partner of REES Capital, an angel investment firm. She focuses on helping other succeed in their entrepreneurial ventures. In her article for Forbes entitled “Every Person Matters in a Company, and There is No Such Thing as an Insignificant Position” she expressed this:

mic drop

“Every single person in a company is a valuable piece of the chain. If they do their part wrong, the entire chain feels the effect. That chain is in a circle that goes round and round, with no beginning and no end. Every person matters and is equally important to the overall functions done in a company. No one person is insignificant or small in the process. Everyone needs each other” for the job they do and role they play in an effort. Did I just heard a mic drop?

know your worth sign

This says it well and in today’s working world, finding ways to make connections with others on the team can lessen the impact of the changes that COVID brought with it. It can also minimize the tendency to value one’s contribution to the team effort as more or less than another’s. Characteristics of a successful team include … members who fulfill their own tasks and help one another. They communicate openly with the team and resolve conflict constructively. Finally, they know they directly contribute to the company’s success. Now all we need to do is to commit to making this happen.
Mike Dorman

Oct 20 2021

Blame COVID for the GOOD Changes That Have Redefined Great Management

conversation

All of us can have conversations about the impact of COVID 19. Whether they be related to our personal lives or the work we do to provide for us and others depending on us, I can’t imagine any argument indicating it has been the ‘same old.’ Personally, we all have something to gain when we stop pacing back and forth waiting for some sense of normalcy. Rather than ranting and raving as to what’s getting in the way of this, how might we devote this energy to adapting and moving forward in all that means?

In looking for examples of positive impact that COVID has had, one place that this is increasingly evident is within the business world. And specifically, the impact on those having leadership responsibilities within any organization. The obvious need to learn how to effectively lead the company, the team or department while so many have worked remotely is something about which most have had zero experience. And still, the leader is overall responsible for achieving the results needed for success.

The successful manager in today’s ‘new normal’ has had to make real shifts in the focus that successful leading requires. They include these key changes:

Embracing remote work as being normal to an ongoing degree
- This means that measurement of work will be more dependent on actual output rather than working side by side and in-person observation

An increased role of technology in employee management
- Having a team working remotely eliminates visual observation to judge productivity and focus. This has required the use of technology to evaluate a person’s performance based on achieved output.

Recognizing changing employee expectation related to what they need
- Remote workers have entered a new arena that has them needing to deal with other realities. The need for childcare or being involved in family management has required leaders to develop awareness and respect for these added needs

THE CHANGES THE GREAT LEADING WILL REQUIRE

Doing research on this topic resulted in some significant changes that any level of management has made. These changes have and are allowing the organization to succeed … either by remaining in business or in achieving significant success. There are some key qualities that are allowing those in management to earn high marks by their employees and/or team members:

Stepping up by recognizing and adapting to the challenges
- Checking in with the team members frequently and consistently
- Being available to guide in the use of technology that has become key
- Being aware of and providing challenged team member with resources to help them overcome and adjust to their new work-related challenges.

The leader’s awareness of a personal need for additional training
- Recognition that remote leading is quite different and requires different skills and sensitivities in order to have reports want to follow the lead.
- Establishing acceptable behaviors for the likes of remote meetings that include acceptable behaviors that facilitate good exchange.
- The needed ability to encourage individual growth and development of skills and knowledge that will further the reports contribution to success.
- Learning to be more sensitive to added challenges faced by many as they became and continue on the remote work path.
- How to establish check-in communication and reporting without creating a sense of micro-management.
Becoming master listeners
- Ask reports what they are experiencing that is creating stress and frustration as they strive to successfully do their job. This allows the manager to find and direct them to resources that can help resolve and overcome such obstacles.
- Question areas wherein the report feels the need for greater connection with others on the team and finding a way to help this happen.
- Asking reports how they feel you as the leader can be more effective in their efforts to achieve intended goals. What does the report need that they aren’t getting that will impact their productivity and sense of calm?

THE UNDERLYING QUALITY THAT CAN MAKE OR BREAK BEING GREAT AT MANAGING

If there is an overriding quality that is helping a manager function in a successful manner in our new world it is the ability to demonstrate and be an empathetic manager. This requires developing elevated levels of trust and care along with having a culture of acceptance. Clearly one size doesn’t fit all, and it becomes much more of an individualized approach that can and will differ from one person to another.

However, the ability to develop and utilize the skills of an empathetic manager is not a given nor it is always an easy transition. It involves learning and developing enhanced sensitivities. This, in turn, imposes a need to devote time to doing so. To an already challenged manager and especially those found in medium or small organizations the task is greater. Yet given its’ importance in our new business environment it is going to require creative thinking and even some significant realignment of responsibilities within the organization, department or team.

Breaking apart the processes of old and reassembling them around the added ‘tool’ of empathy can help to identify the path forward recognizing and accepting the new world of today and tomorrow. And even in the normal we once knew, demonstrating empathy as an accomplished leadership skill can only add to a leader’s and their organization’s success. Agreed?
Mike Dorman

Oct 06 2021

Applying Kobe’s Leadership Philosophy to Effectively Leading Today

Both before Kobe Bryant tragically died in January of last year and since, much has been written about how he viewed his role as a leader. Some 9 years ago, I blogged about this. Given the challenges that leaders in all arenas have faced over the last 19 months, I revisited Kobe’s philosophy curious as to how his approach and beliefs would apply today. Would they be outdated, or do they have even more meaning?

Here are the core beliefs by which Kobe Bryant lived, conducted his life and led:

“Leadership is responsibility””
There comes a point when one must make a decision. Are YOU willing to do what it takes to push the right buttons to elevate those around you? If the answer is YES, are you willing to push the right buttons even if it means being perceived as the villain? Here’s where the true responsibility of being a leader lies.”
“Sometimes you must prioritize the success of the team ahead of how your own image is perceived. The ability to elevate those around you is more than simply sharing (the ball) or making teammates feel a certain level of comfort. It’s pushing them to find their inner beast, even if they end up resenting you for it at the time.“
“I’d rather be perceived as a winner than a good teammate. I wish they both went hand in hand all the time but that’s just not reality.”

Sounds like a no-nonsense stance, doesn’t it? Yet accepting the opportunity to be a leader brings with it the responsibility of doing so effectively. Without question most all will agree that leadership in the COVID era required changes. The added elements include:

Leading remotely.
Overseeing a team that had other responsibilities to accomplish during the regular workday.
Devising effective ways to communicate as needed with a team or individuals.
Being sensitive to added challenges imposed on workers given their home-based status.
Being aware of the need for tools that the team requires to produce the work … and finding the way to provide them.

As I see it, leading a team or organization since early 2020 didn’t change any of Kobe’s doctrine. If anything, it served to enhance the need and sensitivity to notice and accept the realities of this added challenge. More than ever the successful leader has needed to …

Put best decisions over popular ones. It’s often surprising how many leaders have a gut instinct about what decision is the right one … and yet, they opt for one that will have greater acceptance among others or will allow others to think more favorably of them, the leader.
Be less concerned about enhancing one’s own perceived valueas leader than allowing others to have the spotlight. This leader allows concern with their own performance to outshine the ultimate goal of achieving the organization’s vision to the max and often that means allowing another to shine.
Be sensitive to the added challenges being faced by employees and letting them know it by your actions … though the leader is also dealing with new/different ones as well.
Become the best listener and make decisions that reflect the fact that you have been that.
Have the confidence to lead and make the decisions that seem right in that moment.

agile leader

Fundamentally, it is Kobe’s epitomizing agile/flexible leadership that made him successful then … and would now. It is that flexibility that proved to be a critical element for maintaining and even accelerating individual and team performance. He proved himself to be adaptable always and he always persevered in the face of challenges and setbacks.

basket ball

Of course, Kobe Bryant’s leadership style was related to basketball. However, when you think about it there is little, if any, difference in leading in any arena. And it goes back to Kobe’s first quote … “Leadership is responsibility”. How many points would you as a leader or those you know make?
Mike Dorman

Sep 21 2021

The Move-Forward COVID Balancing Act … Between Employer vs Employee Desires and Needs

Remember the time when running and business and having a job seemed rather straight forward and yes, even simple? The company had openings and they looked for the right fit. If the conditions were appealing to the prospective hire, they accepted the job and both ‘sides’ were happy and satisfied. If this sounds simple it’s probably because it was especially when compared to today’s reality of COVID still being a major factor for all parties.

what is your plan question mark

Now, we are going on 20 months of reshaping and retooling the business and the approach needed to remain viable. Now, organizations have had to change the way business functions to keep our teams safe and healthy. Though we want to return to the comfort of how we have operated for many years past, it’s not a realistic given. Business leaders have their own personal opinions related to COVID and vaccinations. However, employees have gained a voice that will influence the ultimate measures and processes that an organization will need consideration.

Many larger companies have reached out to employees to find out aspects of their jobs that are their concerns and needs. There is little doubt that these have changed … the result of changes imposed on workers because of COVID. Steelcase, the manufacturer of office furniture, has summarized their findings that represent the findings of many organizations.

Overall, employees have spent months at home either full or part-time. Thus they are more in touch with what they expect from their jobs and workplace.
They have new and increased expectations of their employers and workplaces. As a result they seek a very different and improved experience than the one they left pre-COVID.
Five critical needs were identified that will change the overall work experience. Although some were in existence pre-pandemic, time spent working at home increased the awareness and importance of each. They are as follows:

EMPLOYEE NEEDS THAT WILL CHANGE THE WORK EXPERIENCE

SAFETY:

Employees in the U.S. identified Air Quality, Adherence to Safety Protocols and Facility Cleanliness as being of greatest importance. It is clear people will need to feel confident that their workplaces are safe. They need to trust that their employers and peers are doing everything possible to keep them safe before returning.
Today, many are working part-time in the office and the balance of time in their residences. They want to choose their days in the office environment to minimize exposure to others not following safety protocols.

BELONGING:

People have a basic need to belong having nothing to do with the pandemic. COVID has left people feeling extremely isolated, making the need to feel part of a community at work more important.
The reality of community created in the workplace not only contributes to people’s wellbeing, but it also leads to better business outcomes as well. People feeling part of a community is a top predictor of higher scores in productivity, engagement, innovation and commitment.
Creating community while people are not able to be together requires significant effort. The more extensively people work from home, the greater the challenge.
The workplace can be designed to help foster a sense of community, and there are three specific attributes that make a positive impact:
- The office has places where leaders are present and accessible.
- There are spaces that foster social interaction and help build a sense of belonging.
- The workplace offers stimulating and inspiring areas that promote and encourage creative thinking and problem solving.
Four key reasons that make employees wanting to return to an office environment at least part-time are:
- The ability to reconnect with colleagues
- Reconnecting to the organization and the shared purpose common to all
- Work in a professional environment
- The ability to collaborate in person

PRODUCTIVITY:

People want to feel that what they do is meaningful. This has been amplified during the crisis as organizations have needed to respond to dramatically changing business conditions.
For those working part-time in the office and the balance of time in their residences they want some choice as to the days they choose the office environment to minimize exposure to any others not choosing of following safety protocols.
Creative work, solving complex problems and innovation all require an ebb and flow between “me” and “we” work. This means the workplace must provide spaces for both that make it easy to transition between the different work modes.
Employees, more so than leaders in many countries, express a need for the office to provide places to focus. Potentially because their home environments are less likely to be the same size or have the same amenities as the office. The 5 most important things that employees want in the office include:
- Collaboration
- Access to tools
- Focus
- Team belonging
- Workplace belonging

COMFORT:

People are more aware of their physical, cognitive and emotional needs for comfort and wellbeing. Therefore, they expect organizations to address them when they return to the office.
Those who have been comfortable at home, whether it be because they enjoyed a more relaxed environment or had created a space to work that fits their preferences, want that to continue in the office.
Those who’ve been uncomfortable working from home are looking forward to an office designed holistically to support their comfort. They are now more acutely aware of their physical aches and pains after working from sofas, kitchen counters and even beds at home.

CONTROL:

While being at home all day has its drawbacks, many people feel they have more control navigating their day at home than they do in the office. They are free to choose if they work from a dedicated office or sit on the sofa or outside. They often have more choice to integrate aspects of their personal lives throughout their day, such as exercising or interacting with family, friends or pets.
In addition to no commute, another aspect of working from home that is highly rated by most participants is increased flexibility. They also feel their work-life balance and level of autonomy improves.
Moving forward, people will want the same level of control over their work lives that they have at home — control over where they work and their environment in the office.

Studies have revealed that the sense of work-life balance is one thing improved as we weathered the pandemic of the past 20 months. The positives of this have resulted in employees wanting and expecting more control over where and how they work. It appears that employers are getting this message and in so doing have a greater chance of retaining and attracting a productive, happy and healthier team. Whether or not an employer personally chooses to not get the COVID vaccination is a personal choice. However, attracting the skilled and desired workforce may just need to put the personal aside and listen to the louder voice of the team.
Mike Dorman

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