Mike, Author at The Third Zone

Jul 06 2022

When Leaders Apologize and The Impact on Ones They Lead

cancelled flights

The news has been filled with horror stories pertaining to airline travel throughout the industry. The percentage of cancelled flights is mind boggling to say nothing of the havoc it wrecks on unsuspecting travelers. It has resulted in people looking forward to long delayed vacations sad, disappointed and just angry.

One leader … the CEO of Delta Airlines, Ed Bastian … was motivated to deliver an apology via letter to the most loyal customers and on Delta’s website. Bill Murphy, contributing editor at INC.com, praised this action as ‘a lesson in effective leadership’. You can dismiss this simply thinking that this example is from the CEO of one of the major companies in the world. And as such it may be easier. Yet, the need to be able to apologize is of greater importance and of greater potential impact in smaller organizations.

Unfortunately, the apparent rarity of saying “I’m sorry” at the top of company, team or store is causing challenges especially today. Given the stress and insecurity that have been a by-product of the past two+ years the need and advisability of this has achieved new height. I believe there are few, if any, leaders that would claim they’ve made only right and good decisions especially during this time. Employees are often told of their errors and what they need to be doing better. It is important that these same individuals understand that errors and poor decisions can be and are made at all levels. They are not limited to position, organizational size, type of business or scope of operation.

Offering an apology that motivates and encourages those being led

The foundation of an apology is the ownership it conveys saying that “I was and am responsible”. A mature and responsible leader knows that in some way they are a good part of the problem, and they willingly claim their share of anything that goes wrong. Here’s the bottom line. If ‘the boss’ makes an error or has made a decision that results in errors, an apology is in order. It is thus acknowledged and the steps that will be taken to ‘fix it’. It builds trust and a closer relationship with those who report to you as leader. Here are come suggested ways to do so effectively:

First, reflect on what was done or said.
Think about and analyze the overall situation and the impact the action had on an individual or team.
Deliver the apology in person if possible … however don’t delay.
Where the apology is directed at just one person, looking them in the eye and owning the leader’s
contribution to the issue is important for the leader’s credibility. This will allow the employee to feel more comfortable and confident to express themselves during the meeting. If in-person not immediately possible contact the individual in another way asap.
Take responsibility for your actions as leader.
After expressing remorse, provide specific actions and/or behavior that was done and the impact on the person or persons involved.
Lead the acknowledgement of the problem by going first.
Doing this serves to break the ice and make it okay for others to own their share of the issues and the situation becomes immediately better.
Be direct as to what went wrong and what you, as leader, did.
Vague doesn’t work. Given that the leader has examined what went wrong, convey in specific, direct terms what he/she did to contribute to the problem is key. It also makes this leader more effective as a leader.

Don’t defend what has been done.
A defense is often failing to accept responsibility. Leaders should avoid self-defense and blaming of others. Simply own it and apologize.

Make amends with the individual or group of employees as appropriate.
After explaining clearly what you as leader has done wrong, detail how this will be corrected and how the error will be avoided in the future. It demonstrates one’s willingness to both correct and overcome the issue. Doing so encourages reports to do the same.

Don’t confuse explanations with justifications.
There may well be reasons things happened or didn’t happen that caused the issue. However, the bottom line is there was still failure that occurred and that is never good. Take responsibility as this helps the other person feel better by allowing them to gather their dignity and confidence. In turn, this makes it easier for them to heal after the situation, which allows you to remain respected and appreciated as a supervisor.

Give them time to provide an appropriate response.
After presenting your apology, allow the employee time to take in your information and devise a response. They may need time to process what happened in the conversation. This may cause them to simply accept your apology or tell you they need time to think. Accept the response they give you and allow them some time to process the situation. They may approach you later with their own apology, or they may express their feelings with a thought-out speech.

Generally speaking, finding oneself in the position of needing to apologize for words or actions expressed to others is not a comfortable place to be. Especially, as a leader, this can and does provide a challenge. To some, being direct and acknowledging responsibility for an error that had trickle-down effect isn’t easy. To some, it is seen as conveying weakness for as a leader one should know better. Of course, that’s not true. To the extent that all leaders see themselves as ongoing learners, mistakes are going to happen. And that is what learning is all about in any position … even the leader. The bottom line is: a good boss should apologize after making a real error that offends or misleads their reports be it one or many. It does NOT undermine his position or make him seem weaker
Mike Dorman

Jun 22 2022

The Perfect Time to Ramp It Up Just ONE Degree!

Relief is in the air. For sure it is what all businesses challenged negatively and impacted by the past 2+ years want, strive to have and are driven to achieve. And, as organizational leaders, their teams or individuals work to make this happen it appears that some are working to get back to the calm and productive path that they have missed. What I wonder is whether the drive is taking them as far as it can and should be? Or is the sense of relief putting unconscious limits on how far we think we can go? My work with various organizations concerns me that it’s the latter.

I recall a quote from the past attributed to Sam Parker and Mac Anderson. What struck me about it is the application and the value it adds to all of us today who are in the process of ‘righting’, rebuilding or just building our businesses to greater heights. It reads …

At 211 degrees…water is hot.
At 212 degrees…it boils.
And with boiling water, comes steam.
And steam can power a locomotive.
And, it’s that one extra degree that makes all the difference.”

So, what could this mean for businesses or individuals who are a part of it today? As we enthusiastically push forward with a sense of relief are organizations just excited to see boiling water again? Is the employee just thrilled to return to an office part or full time? Ah … we can breathe easier. But wait! Breathing easier as such, while welcome, has its’ own potential and unnecessary cost. It may be depriving some from getting the steam that just one more degree of effort could bring.

extra extra headline

I believe there is value to think about applying the ‘one extra degree’ to an overall business, department, team or just you today … now! How does an entity or person take advantage of every opportunity that can be created to thrive and take efforts to the extreme of their potential?

Here are some areas of focus that must be considered in reemerging into the resulting ‘normal’ post COVID and the places where that extra degree can make the difference … and the desired steam:

Adapting the marketing approach to the customers preferences
- How they buy today and from whom they buy has clearly been impacted by the experience of the past 2+ years. This must guide the revamping of any approach one is inclined to consider and employ.

The approach to selling the product must reflect new habits the buyer has developed while isolated or restricted in easy mobility
- Whether a business or a retail customer is the aim, the revamped approach must recognize the changing pattern in how the customer prefers to buy. This will create needs to alter past systems to accommodate this changing mindset and pattern
Enthusiastically embracing ever advancing technology
- COVID and remote workforces required that organizations buy into the need and value of technology that would ease the imposed challenges. In pursuit of the extra degree means pushing this further. Going forward customer preferences in this arena must be incorporated into how business is done going forward. It is critical!
Customer service must be reimagined, redefined and taken to a new level
- Even if an organization has prided itself in delivering excellent service in the past, that has taken on a new definition and meaning. The customer has discovered a larger world of options. By taking a definition of ‘outstanding’ service to a never imagined level increases the opportunity of both retaining past and attracting new customers.

Working extra hard to nurture and solidify current customers
- Often the focus put on a drive to attract and win new customers comes at the expense of ignoring current ones. Yet, it is those current/past customers who can rebuild the foundation that a successful effort requires. With the uncertainty of the past 2+ years, the likelihood is good that your past customers will welcome the return to what they know and appreciate. Take advantage of that by letting them loudly and clearly know of their importance to the organization.

There is little doubt that the business world is hungry to emerge into a sense of business calm and reason. Some members of this community seem to have their sights on returning to what was for that they know and understand. This makes sense however the question to ask is if this is taking full advantage of what could be? As a first step, you need to define what the ‘extra one degree’ would mean to the organization or simply to you and the job you do. Knowing this and understanding that path, don’t be fooled into thinking that it’s a snap or it’s no big deal. Afterall, we’re talking about the ONE degree that takes us from ‘hot’ to ‘boiling’ and that, in turn, can make the difference between good and great … redefined success or settling for what was.

Whenever I have watched someone take the step of cranking it up just one degree it has had the effect of opening a very wide door of possibility. What might it do for your organization or for you as a member of the team? It’s exciting exploration and can make a dramatic difference in the success you experience. No sweat if you wear warm weather clothing to withstand the boiling heat you’ll encounter!
Mike Dorman

Jun 08 2022

The Emergence of Bulls In the China Shop

Chances are that as it relates to the work we do, we have come face to face with a version of the bull in the china shop. We can’t help but to be aware of it … its’ presence … and its’ impact. Although such a bull is not new, it appears that the various work-related stresses and challenges of the past 2+ years have contributed to more such personalities emerging.

As organizational leaders work to bring their organizations back to some form of normalcy some ‘bosses’ have taken the path of get tough and be firm. And how these traits are being demonstrated in some instances is resulting in creating more issues rather than fewer issues. Let me describe such an unsettling situation that actually has solutions.

Consider Bill, who is fulfilling a much needed leadership position in a large organization. He has been there for a 3+ years. He has always been considered to be doing an excellent job on the technical aspects of the position. In fact, he is being seriously thought of as worthy of promotion into the executive level of the company. Thought of … yes and here comes the ‘but’. He also has come to act like an enormous bull. He moves among others in ways that alienates co-workers, discourages interactions actually needed in the business. He has created a large group who work to stay out of contact with him unless absolutely necessary. This group is comprised of co-workers, reports and bosses. He justifies this change in his approach as needed to get his reports ‘back in line’ after the upset to established routines associated with COVID.

Maybe this works in some company cultures or at least, doesn’t stand out as much. In fact, Bill believes he has been very successful in this very direct and straightforward manner. However, for him, in this organization and at this time, it has the impact of the noise that results from scratching ones’ nails down the chalkboard. He understands that his success in this job absolutely requires that he alter his method and style of communicating. He is responsible to act in ways that will build positive and necessary working relationships. As such he has entered into a coaching relationship to resolve this issue once and for all. Have you ever experienced a Bill?

Before Bill can be successful in making change he needs to understand and recognize what he is doing or not doing that is creating the negativity he is experiencing. Here are the most prevalent ones and what needs to change:

Focusing on the individual rather than the issue at hand
Current Approach:
You did this job like this and you’re wrong. As such you’ve created a lot of unnecessary work for …. I’m very unhappy with you!
Altered Approach:
When the job is done in this manner it creates complexities down the line that aren’t necessary. It will eliminate this problem if done like this …… What do you need from me to make this change?
Picking the right time and place to address an issue involving another person
Current Approach:
When Bill is in a management or team meeting and has a criticism to deliver to one other participant he thinks nothing of blurting out his displeasure and criticism in front of all others. This creates embarrassment on the part of the target person while others are somewhat appalled while they watch in silence.
Altered Approach:
For Bill to be effective and have his message heard, he needs to wait until he is able to speak privately to the other individual. He often has valid points however choosing how and where to deliver them can avoid the negativity of others towards him.
Being unable and unwilling to accept his own errors and the criticism of others
Current Approach:
Although very able to point out shortcomings of others, when confronted with something that Bill has done incorrectly, he becomes very defensive. As such, he still manages to lash out at the person making the point and blaming them for not correcting the error.
Altered Approach:
As a company leader, one is watched by others to do their job in the ‘right’ way in conducting themselves in their roles. It’s an opportunity to demonstrate effective communication and leadership. The ability to graciously accept responsibility for his own work and make needed corrections going forward will result in enhanced respect from others.

Public email communication that is only designed to communicate with one person
Current Approach:
If Bill has a problem that involves just one other person the tendency is to deliver his message and related criticism via email. This email is copied to several others on the departmental or company team. This megaphone approach creates embarrassment and minimal acceptance from all recipients.
Altered Approach:
Emails should be sent to include only those to whom Bill needs to speak. Public lashing brings about an unintended reaction that has no positive aspects to it.

think before acting sign

Just as having the technical skill to be successful in any particular job is key, so is the ability to meld into the organizational culture if one is to realize true success. Personal attacks that are delivered without sensitivity to how, when, where and in front of whom simply don’t work! They only work well to bring about blame, contempt, defensiveness and complete closing down in terms of good communication. As this is the untended consequence of such an approach, there is a real and positive payoff to giving moments of consideration to the audience and how one can best deliver their message to have it received, accepted and appreciated. Bulls do well in the ring … red capes and all. They are definitely out of place in that china shop and go there with significant risk.
Mike Dorman

May 18 2022

Retaining Customers – Added Challenges in the Emerging New Normal

Attracting and retaining customers has forever been the drive and the key goal for business of any type. And as the goal it has often presented challenges that have been created by various circumstances not always in the control of the organizations. This has definitely been the situation of the past 2+ years. Now, in May of 2022, we are hopefully emerging out of the pandemic that in various ways hijacked the best plans and intentions. And, as has often been stated, in emerging we are not returning to the business atmosphere that was. We are emerging to an environment of the new normal. So, in terms of attracting and retaining customers, what does that mean?

First, let’s explore how various organizations have looked at the loss of a customer(s). Perhaps it was the oldest, biggest or most profitable and the reactions regardless of the customer varied. I’ve seen some try to laugh it off. Another was simply angry … at the client given all ‘we have done for them’. A third reaction was just being sad and puzzled. Yet regardless of the initial reaction actually examining the situation generally takes all to a place of concern.

Upon reflection and examination, what created the puzzle and lack of understanding as to why the customer was lost included:

They didn’t recall any negative conversations and viewed this as an easy customer.
They may have done a poor job of really listening to their contact and missed some warning signs of discontent.
They realized they had no real relationship or interface with any people in higher positions if the customer was a company, thus making them vulnerable.
They viewed this customer as a long-term relationship requiring little attention.

Do you see any red flags? I bet you do. Even though doing things to change the above pitfalls seems so logical we find that getting comfortable … too comfortable … is not a rare occurrence.

HOW THE CHALLENGE HAS INTENSIFIED SINCE 2020

Now consider today and what might be different that can intensify the threat of losing our customers. It has much to do with what the customers have had to endure and what adapting has required. Regardless of a particular business thriving in a COVID impacted world or suffering, it is the customer’s lives that have been turned upside down. For us to retain past/current ones or attract new ones we need to focus on and understand what they have endured.

The answer is defined in two simple words … CUSTOMER SERVICE. Most people do understand that the places they like to go to do business have also been challenged. Most people have also been extremely frustrated in adapting to the changes that have been imposed … just as the business has. However the one thing that customers see as in their control is the level of service they receive when working with a company of any type.

Shep Hyken is a customer service and experience expert and a New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestselling author. Perhaps logically, he has explored and researched this very issue and the experience of customers navigating the challenges related to doing business. Here are some of his key findings as presented in his Forbes report:

There was a major jump in customer inquiries, complaints and support calls. Companies adapted with digital support—some better than others.

At first, customers were a bit more understanding about long wait or response times, but quickly lost patience as they realized the companies and brands weren’t making an effort to adapt to their changing needs, which were based on the rapidly changing times.

A survey of more than 1,100 consumers found that 50% have prioritized customer service as a deciding factor about whether or not to do business with a brand. If you’re a company that focuses on customer service you could have a competitive advantage.

One third (33%) of the consumers surveyed claimed they had switched brands due to poor customer service since the beginning of COVID-19.

Sixty-four percent would switch after just two or three bad interactions. Furthermore, 67% report having the same or less patience for bad service since COVID-19 began.

STEPS TAKEN TO RESOLVE THIS THREATENING SITUATION:

Concerning? For sure and it should be. And the question becomes what to do about it that will resolve this very real and threatening situation? Here are some very practical steps to be taken within the entire organization as it relates to customers:

Adopt the mindset of ”NEVER AGAIN” and communicate this to all in the organization
Look at a loss as a signal of other potential problems within the customer base. Attributing it as just being ‘that’ customer is a serious oversight.
Create a litmus test to perform on each relationship to uncover weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Accept every customer comment as delivering a message that may need to be addressed and improved.

Openly share each incident with the organization and certainly the management group to discuss changes that can avoid this going forward regardless of how big or small the issue appears to be.

Resolving an issue or answering a problem on the first call makes sense. Nobody wants to keep calling back regarding the same issue a second or third (or fourth or fifth) time. Nobody wants to wait on hold wondering when they are going to get to someone who can help them. That’s customer effort.

Shep Hyken concludes his findings like this. Eighty percent of customers say that when their problems and complaints are managed well, they feel more emotionally connected to the company. Note: You can’t have customer loyalty without an emotional connection.

staff training sign

So, how do you lose customers? Even more important than price or product quality, just give them a bad customer service experience. Make them work hard to get to someone who can help. Waste their time with long hold times, not giving them an option to have a callback. Connect them with people who haven’t been properly trained or don’t have the knowledge to answer questions. If you’re guilty of any of these (or other related customer service blunders), it’s time to change course. In these times of heightened customer expectations and demands, you have to be good enough for them to say, “Even when there is a problem, I can count on them. I’ll be back.” Otherwise, say, “Goodbye.”

litmus paper

The longer we have a relationship with a customer the more relaxed and comfortable it becomes from all sides. However, when easier and comfortable spills over the line wherein we take the relationship for granted we risk finding ourselves on a rocky and unstable path. Clearly the past recent years have left their mark. It becomes the job of every business to respect and respond to this reality. Does it make sense to take inventory in your customers? Litmus paper is VERY inexpensive and a great tool for an on-going check-up.
Mike Dorman

May 04 2022

The Risks Of Acting Solely On the Basis of Our Assumptions

Regardless of type or size of an organization, one challenge that has permeated most, at all levels, is the tendency and willingness of people to move forward on a project, in their overall job or simply general conversation based on what they understood. We often just assume that we ‘get it’ and don’t need to or feel we have the freedom to question … whether it comes from a boss or co-worker. Unfortunately, how we interpret what we heard, or saw doesn’t make it correct. It’s our assumption rather than knowing it to be fact and that’s when problems arise. Problems that will often prove to be costly, cause frustration and, a general unrest within the team.

I hasten to say that this situation is far from rare. In fact, learning how to manage or work with our teams or co-workers has only become a bigger challenge. Today’s ‘new normal’ into which we are emerging simply enlarges the potential and challenge. In fact, it lays at the foundation of many issues that rear their head within any company … how to have good, clear, basic and effective communication.

Who owns the job of making certain there is a shared understanding?

Whose job is it to get clarification that aligns all behind the same understanding? The answer is simple. It’s everyone’s job. The organization’s ultimate desire and goal is to operate with the maximum level of efficiency and the minimum amount of rework. The employee wants to be successful in their work and be appreciated for their contribution. The starting point for this happening comes through an across-the-board effort of having clear communication and arriving on the same page of shared understanding.

Mara Vizzuitti penned an article entitled “The Poser in Checking Out Your Assumptions” that addressed this issue. She said that “As long as we’re in relationships with others, be it in the workplace or in our personal lives, we are only going to have communication glitches. We would do well to expect them. One of the reasons for this is our propensity for making assumptions about people and events that occur around us. Most of the time, our assumptions are just plain wrong.

In other words, we’re pretty good at deciding what that ‘look’ means or what that ‘email’ means. We even assume we know what people are thinking. It is natural to make judgments, as our brains are constantly processing information. However, we make up stories about the “way he or she is” potentially creating issues with others that don’t exist. It is likely that 80 percent of conflict is based in fantasy.”

true false sign 1

We have all experienced this scenario. We see someone make a face at something we may have said and immediately we tend to make up what that means. Like … they don’t like the idea … it’s a silly one … they don’t think we know what we’re talking about … or they just disagree with us. All of this because of someone else’s look or action. And, unless we are willing to question what we saw we will not ever know that our assumptions are, in fact, true or just an erroneous assumption.

What problems are created when we operate on the basis of assumptions?

As a leadership coach Ben Brearly has researched this very issue and has identified ways in which making assumptions damages a team. First, he provides three reasons that we should all stop making them:

Making assumptions closes your mind
They create ‘labels’ that we attach to other i.e., fantastic, lazy and once attached they become harder to shake them off.

Making assumptions can upset your team
buying into the idea that Jim is lazy and thus not as productive as he needs to be or that Rita is a superstar and treating her as such risks demoralizing the rest of the team which doesn’t bring a winning outcome.
Making assumptions makes it hard to change your mind
If you take on opinions and have developed a perception of Jim, he is in for a tough life at work. He is going to have to work extra hard to fight back against that assumption and to change your mind. The only problem is, everything he does is likely to be seen in the light of “his laziness” and it becomes a hopeless cause.

If someone in your team is in this unfortunate situation because of an assumption of their behavior or ability, it will be a hard road for them to change your mind. The result is that they may choose to leave your team rather than enter a lengthy battle to change your mind. You may just have alienated someone who could have been good for the team.

Acknowledging that there are harmful and unproductive risks associated with making assumptions about people here are suggestions as to how we can stop doing this:

When you don’t have information, get three points of view.
At time, and especially today in a work-world shaped by COVID, we don’t have the chance to see your team members as closely as you’d like to. It’s tempting to just get somebody else’s opinion and use it as your own.

Instead, be patient. Collect opinions from at least three people who do have the opportunity to work with the person you are wondering about. Three opinions are better than one. If somebody close to you is trying to influence your opinion of somebody else, they are less likely to succeed if you use multiple sources to try to find the truth.
Understand people’s motives
When you hear somebody criticize someone’s work ethic or ability, be wary of taking this opinion for yourself. You always need to question the motives of people around you. Are they in competition with the other person? Do they feel threatened by their experience or skill?

You don’t need to act as if every comment is part of a murder mystery, but it still pays to be impartial, and to think about what may be driving the behavior of the person giving you the information.

How can we best counter a tendency to move forward only on our assumptions?

What is particularly important is that we become curious and enter a communication wanting to truly ‘hear’ the response regardless of what it may be. Here are some simple ways to check out our assumptions as identified by Vizzutti:

Ask Permission:
Can I check something out with you?
Describe the behavior:
Yesterday, I noticed you made a face while I was presenting my suggestions for moving forward …
State your Assumption:
“I assumed you were upset with what I had said …”
Ask an open-ended question: “Is this true? What were you thinking?

In making your inquiry as you seek to determine the validity of your ‘made-up’ conclusions you are going to find out one of two things: Either …

you will find that your assumptions were just wrong and nowhere near the truth.

or …

you will determine that your interpretation is correct, and you can then have open conversation to understand the other person(s) better and create how you can avoid such unintended consequences or at least minimize this in the future.

be curious sign 1

Regardless of what you discover you will then know how you should and need to proceed. Perhaps nothing other than to work to tame your imagination. Or perhaps you will need to have more conversation to understand the other person’s point of view. Just remaining satisfied that your original assumption is right will eventually impact the relationship negatively resulting in withdrawal from the other person(s). That in turn can clearly impact both the organization’s success and one’s personal satisfaction and enjoyment of his/her jobs.

Think about it. All it takes is talk … something we do pretty easily!
Mike Dorman

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