Most often the blogs I write contend with situations within a business environment. Still, even when coaching a client dealing with business related issues and challenges I am readily aware of the fact that whatever the issues, they are a part of the whole person and it is often things outside of a job or business that are impacting the individual that need to be addressed.
The Situation we are living with today
There is no better example I can think of than COVID-19 that has impacted us all in ways that know no boundaries. The work we do … or did, the ways in which we 
live day to day and the relationships we have are all going through major upheaval. And although we truly hope that this is only a temporary situation, I do believe that thinking about and creating our individual and collective plan as to what we would and can do if temporary is actually long-term makes good sense. Addressing ‘What if’ allows each of us to have our Plan B … on the shelf … and that alone moves us back to one wagging the tail rather than feeling helpless and victimized.
Regardless of whether you personally believe that Coronavirus is real, manufactured, created by one group or another or receiving an overblown response, the fact remains that we are all having to deal with the reality of it. As such we are living in a state of doing with a day to day or hour to hour focus. How do I get my work done if I cannot go into the office? How to I keep my children occupied in a productive way? How can I provide for my family if I have been furloughed or laid off? What else can I do to generate income needed to live? How do I not go crazy being alone without the ability to see or be with others? These are all real reactions and concerns and yet … remaining here only heightens our concerns and worries.
There is another place that we can go that will put us in a place of taking back control of what is and what is to come. I’ll call it ‘dreamland’. It’s the place of what’s possible … someplace wherein we get to brainstorm all of the things that we could possibly do that might lead to our ability to turn our current state of questions and panic into our ability to design the path we WANT to take. Such a path puts us back in charge of doing what we believe and know is necessary and is best for us in our situation.
In this two-part blog, I want to address things that we all can to do take us to the place wherein we can be creative and devise solutions will apply and work for each of us in our varying situations (dreamland). Once able to effectively ‘dream’ and envision options available to us, we can effectively examine how we might pursue those that make real sense to us. In other words, put us back into the driver’s seat in order to take us to a place that can work … despite being in a COVID-19 world.
Creating the path to dreamland
- Undertaking some activity that we find relaxing … even for minutes in the day
As a first step to taking charge of your situation one needs to identify an activity in which they find comfort and yes, escape from the stress that has been created. This might be meditation, going for a run, digging in the garden or doing a physical workout. Recognizing such a thing as a need rather than a luxury we don’t have time for allows us to create the break from all else going on in our current and tumultuous existence. It allows us to become centered and keep our feet on the ground and is especially important! - Setting boundaries within the walls of our residence
Suddenly many of us find ourselves living 24/7 with others who are not normally around as such. Granted this can be crazy-making and extremely stressful. Yet, recognizing ones’ need to have personal space … time alone … can and should lead to our ability to express our individual needs along with all others doing the same and having them respected. - Identifying opportunities that having a family under the roof full-time represent
Perhaps school-age children can continue their learning via on-line applications or perhaps they are being home-schooled in their regular subjects. Yet, being at home opens the door to you as a parent to be able to expose them to learning that is not covered in the classroom. Maybe it is cooking, cleaning, gardening, on-line courses that help them learn something of interest to them and something that might be of value going forward.
Bring structure to the current situation rather than simply wishing it to end
In an overall sense, we are all used to living our days with a certain structure. If we have jobs, we are expected to be in the office between certain hours of the day. If children are in school, they are involved as such between certain hours. If they are involved in after-school programs it encompasses more time each day. Daily we tend to eat and go to bed at specific times. Such structure is ‘normal’ and we all function with it. Therefore, creating a similar structure becomes a way to create new norms for all.
As a means of operating from within the ‘what if’ arena and being able to move from victim of the past and current to designer of how we want to move forward, transporting ourselves to the ‘dream’ room is key. There we are allowed to envision the possibilities in front of us and is key to taking charge of how we travel through and transcend this world so impacted by COVID-19. We get to be creative recognizing that we are living in a world different than yesterday. As such, we will then see what we need in terms related to ourselves, family, friends, and work.
The next blog will address possibilities available to all of us that allow us to chart the course that works best for us in serving the very real needs we have. In the meantime, following the suggestions that will create your dreamland. View this as your experimental lab. It’s a place to explore and try knowing that some things will work and some won’t. What it will provide is a place that allows us to move forward and that seems particularly important today.
Mike Dorman
Bravo!